Written for Natalie Claire King's blog for engaged couples planning their day.
I can tell you from experience that planning is key to managing wedding stress. You’ve heard it a thousand and one times, if you fail to prepare then prepare to fail.
Think of weddings like one big, elaborate project. Projects need planning, right? If you’re a fly by the seat of your pants kind of couple, I applaud you. If that’s not you, read on to help you get to your ideal I-do moment without the stress.
Use your time wisely
Rarely is the question popped and weeks later is the wedding held. Engagement periods can be anywhere from three months to two years or more. If you have time up your sleeve, utilising it from the beginning will mean you’ll have more choice of suppliers and vendors, time to save for the day, and less last-minute details to organise when the day looms close.
My top three vendors to lock in early are, the venue, your celebrant and your photographers or videographers. There are some great checklists online that you’ll find with a quick Google search that will help you plan which vendors to book when.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help
Weddings aren’t done in isolation, they take a tribe and at the very minimum they take two. Both parties to the marriage should contribute to crafting the big day. Split the list, talk about what you want so you know on the day that it’s how you both wanted it to be. This could be a great communication exercise for you.
You’ve got family, friends and a wedding party eager to help you. All you need to do is ask.
Plan B
Is there someone you’ve dreamed about having on your day so much so you have tunnel vision? Avoid the let down by having a shortlist of vendors/suppliers for each element of the day. That way, if you get anyone of them you’ll be over the moon.
Rain, hail, or shine
There’s no better words to a Celebrant’s ears than, ‘Yes, we have a wet weather option’. If you’re in Melbourne then you could experience four seasons in a day so being prepared is the way to go. We can’t predict what the weather will be like a year to 18 months down the road. Talk to your venue about what options are available; inside, under a marquee or at another location?
Writer's block
This is another moment in the planning process where planning is best. Really take some time to think about what you want to say to the amazing person you’re about to spend the rest of your life with.
There is nothing wrong with jumping online and having a gander at what others have said but why not have a go yourself? Follow the steps below to help you beat the block.
Agree on a word limit together. 150 - 300 words is usually a good guide
Take the time to draft your vows and if you have 5, 10, 50 revisions that's ok
Give yourself some space to write and remove yourself from distractions like phones
Practice with a friend or family member
Balance your jokes with sincerity and a generous sprinkle of heart
Talk to your celebrant, they’re there to help you get the words on paper or simply get you started
The human element
If you’ve got time then pace yourself. It’s ok to take a break when it’s getting too much and your second cousin wants to bring their new partner of two weeks (this definitely happens). Your day should be a celebration of your love, not the biggest bouquets or elaborate venues - strip back the bells and whistles and focus on what’s important to you two.